After you move to Denmark, you will have a lot of challenges to overcome
if you want to socialize with the locals. First of all they are a
little skittish and hard to talk to in public spaces. There is a lot of
them, but they keep their head down, are absorbed with their devices and
they like to keep their distance. Even if one manages to overcome the first
obstacle, their language is hard to understand and even harder to speak as a tiny mispronunciation can lead to complete misunderstanding.
While working, which is their favorite activity, they want to talk work
but they are hard to extend work relationship outside of the work place. And after they leave the work area, if they are not in public spaces
they are unusually hard to find. It is like they disappear. If you are really hell bent on socializing with them, you need to find them first
without invading their private residences because that will make them
even more skittish. So where are they hiding?
Most likely they are hiding in some organized union involved in some activities that people in the
union find fun. So, next logical step is to think about your favorite
activity, google it, find out if it exists in your place of residence,
see where and when it is being organized and go there.
You
may think that it is over now since you are socializing with the locals
but, trust me, you are barely scratching the surface. For now, what you
are doing is only participating in the activity that you all like to
share. But forming a closer relationship will take some time. One reason
is that most of the conversations will revolve around the activity you
are involved with.
They
call it the significant third. It is an activity which everyone enjoys
and which serves as a connecting tissue for the people who are gathered
around it. So, what happens is that the significant third is an easy
topic that comes naturally but going beyond it is a bit hard. But I guess
that for you extroverts out there it is a bit easier.
So,
you have successfully overcame all the above mentioned challenges and
you have found a person you would like to hang out with. Then you are
over, right? Wrong! Now you need to fit into his or her schedule, and
that is much harder then you think. Danes plan everything and they plan
it far into the future. Christmas planning starts a day after Christmas.
Family gatherings are planed couple of weeks in advance. In Denmark
nothing is spontaneous. Spur of the moment activities are virtually non
existent and the absolute worst thing that you can do to a Dane is to
cancel an appointment or just barge in unannounced. That makes them go completely ballistics. They
will rage! In silence of course because emotional expressions outside of
funerals are illegal.
Now
you have yourself a potential friend. Be vary though, if he invites you
to his home, do not bring presents, you may scare him away.
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